This morning I wake up to a beautiful sunrise and a clear sky
Knowing that today will be a good day.
And I search for a video we played at your service
So I can see your face
And feel that hole in my soul… feel close to you.
10 months ago
you took yourself out of the conversation
And when you ended your life… you ended mine too… and the lives of those who love you
And so we who survive pick up the pieces and assemble them into what seems like life
What looks like life
And as we go through the motions of life
It is we who have become ghosts.
Searching for your face in the crowd
or waiting for you to come through the door
And all the little things are now become
If you were here today, we would find something to laugh about
And something to do.
So I will hold your mother in my arms at night
And we will share our grief together
Her tears are my tears, and we will not hold them back
Nor will we move on
Nor will we get over it
This episode doesn’t resolve like that.
Learning to walk
Learning to breathe
Learning to be real in a world that will always seem wrong.
desperately missing its son.