This morning I wake up to a beautiful sunrise and a clear sky
Knowing that today will be a good day.
And I search for a video we played at your service

So I can see your face

And feel that hole in my soul… feel close to you.

10 months ago

you took yourself out of the conversation

you left.

And when you ended your life… you ended mine too… and the lives of those who love you


And so we who survive pick up the pieces and assemble them into what seems like life

What looks like life

And as we go through the motions of life

It is we who have become ghosts.

Searching for your face in the crowd

or waiting for you to come through the door
And all the little things are now become

big things

If you were here today, we would find something to laugh about

And something to do.

So I will hold your mother in my arms at night

And we will share our grief together

Her tears are my tears, and we will not hold them back
Nor will we move on
Nor will we get over it
This episode doesn’t resolve like that.

Learning to walk
Learning to breathe
Learning to be real in a world that will always seem wrong.
desperately missing its son.


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