I thought…

I thought…
I thought I had a dream. I thought I had a future…
I thought I had a life to look forward to.
I thought I was happy. I thought I had joy.
I really did.
And if I try to remember all of that… I try
Like looking through old photographs
And all I find in memories… old happy memories…
Are fragments and pain.
It is almost like it never happened.
Like I was watching a movie… over and over again…
Until the actors and the images just melted off the screen

Into colorful blobs…
I thought I had a dream and future… and all I have is now.
And in this now I am living in

You are not.

You are missing.
You are ashes.
I thought I had a dream…
And maybe I did… once.
Before all of this shit.

And now all I have are ashes.

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