So a few days ago we had an artist reception down at the gallery with an open mic. A few of the artist stayed late and talked art and I rolled into my driveway at about midnight and went quickly to bed.

I dreamt about being at the show… and Aeron Brown, our gallery owner and curator was handing me a guitar and asking me to play “Everlong”… the Foo Fighters song. “I don’t really know it.” I started to say. “It’s not a problem,” Aeron answered with his usual positive enthusiasm. And he told me the chords in that magical dream way that I could see them in my head and I sat down in front of a small, forgiving, but engaged crowd and struggled through the song with some difficulty… and they politely clapped.

The next day I picked through the song to see how closely the chords were to what is in the acoustic version of the song… and it was close with the little chromatic run missing. (Once I found out that the tuning was drop D… change the inversions, it was actually pretty spot on.)

So I told Aeron about it the next day and we had a laugh.

I did not tell him the song makes me cry. I did not tell him that I haven’t played guitar in over three years because even that makes me cry. I did not tell him that it was the one song that Ethan learned and played for me and that I was impressed by that. So now when the acoustic version comes on the radio, I tear up. I think of the last time Ethan was in this house… of him playing this for me on guitar and me telling him that I wanted him to show it to me… but that within a month from that last visit… he would be dead

So tonight I looked it up and tuned the e string down to d… and struggled through it until it was something that I could practice. Singing the lyrics, playing for the first time in three years and yeah, it was a little rough at first and still rough after a while. But it is something I can work on and maybe sing in front of a small and forgiving crowd who may or may not know why the song makes me cry.


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