Melting into the shadows

It was blue and bright… there
Watching over the happiness
But it was lost in the tumble and mess
Like snow accumulating
an undulating wave of garbage

I could wait for it all to be over now
To melt into the earth
And join with the dark rich soil
I could sink into the unfathomable void
Without complaint
I could ease myself toward the light
and dissipate like a summer rain

And when it comes down to it…
the aches and pains and mad ranting
and the ringing in my ears
I wear my grief
Hoist it like a flag, flying from the rigging.

And I wonder if there is a hand on the rope…
a belayer? Or is it just friction
And is the math up to par?
Before I leap, I sense the need to close my eyes
Or stare off into eternity
Because it doesn’t matter, really
After I jump… if the fall is controlled or not.


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