It was blue and bright… there
Watching over the happiness
But it was lost in the tumble and mess
Like snow accumulating
an undulating wave of garbage
I could wait for it all to be over now
To melt into the earth
And join with the dark rich soil
I could sink into the unfathomable void
I could ease myself toward the light
and dissipate like a summer rain
And when it comes down to it…
the aches and pains and mad ranting
and the ringing in my ears
I wear my grief
Hoist it like a flag, flying from the rigging.
And I wonder if there is a hand on the rope…
a belayer? Or is it just friction
And is the math up to par?
Before I leap, I sense the need to close my eyes
Or stare off into eternity
Because it doesn’t matter, really
After I jump… if the fall is controlled or not.